You Want To Know the Myth From Money & Fear?
Many people are afraid of money, especially their money. Think
about it, when was the last time you were at a dinner party and everyone was talking about how much money they had, or didn’t have?
Probably not very recently. While we as a society have discovered
that it’s permissible to talk about the neighbor’s divorce, your sister’s
therapy sessions, or your grandfather’s bout with cancer, no one feels
it’s alright to talk about their financial situation. And, sure, maybe it’s
not the best idea to brag about how much money you’ve saved in
your company 401(k), or that you have thousands of dollars in outstanding credit card debt, but you’d be surprised at how many people
feel the same way or are in the same situation.
Facing your fears about money is probably the hardest thing
you’ll ever do. But what exactly are you so afraid of? Losing all your
money? Not being able to afford those material things your friends
can? Not having enough? And how much is enough money, anyway?
In order to get control of your money and realize your goal of being
rich, you need to know where you are starting from, and get hold of
Sometimes our fear of money is directly linked to a past action
that drives us. For instance, when you were young did you get an
allowance? What did you do with this money? Save it or spend it?
Does your reaction to your allowance connect with your reaction to
your current salary? In other words, do you still find it hard to part
with your money, or are you spending it the minute you get it? By
identifying your money habits, it becomes easier to change the bad
habits. Of course, fear may drive you away from even looking at your
The only way to eradicate your fear is to replace it with positive
thoughts. Think about what your goals are. Then think about what
your deepest financial fear is. Do you want to retire early, but are
afraid that if you do you will run out of money before you die? Or
perhaps you want to have a second home, but feel that if you buy one
you are being selfish and that you don’t deserve it. No matter what
your goals are, your fears can override them to the point that you
become too paralyzed to try and achieve your goals. Ultimately, you
need to overcome your fears to realize your dreams.
Money is also deeply tied to our emotions and is a prime motivator of our behavior. Our self-images are directly affected by the
amount of money we have or don’t have. Try to become aware of
your attitudes toward money. Once you have ascertained how you
react to money, and what drives you, you will be able to increase your
chances of becoming rich. Your personal money management style
will dictate the way you handle money now and in the future. You
need to realize what your style is so that you may better harness and
Ask yourself some questions about your actions and feelings. Is
money important to you? How important? Do you feel guilty when
you spend money? Do you find that you spend money until your
credit card is rejected, or until you have no more money in your wallet? Are you a risk taker? When you look at your bank account balance, how do you feel? How much money do you think you need to
feel secure? How much money do you spend on a monthly basis? By
asking yourself these questions, you will be on the way to achieving
However, the next step is to answer the questions honestly. That’s
where our fears come back into play. Take the last question, for
instance. I ask all my clients to prepare a cash flow statement for me.
(This is discussed more in depth in Chapter 2.) If you were to estimate how much money you spend monthly, and then compare it to
the actual amount, which number would be bigger? You may find
that you are spending more money each month than you thought.
How does that make you feel? Are you afraid that you won’t be able
to cover your bills? Or, do you feel relieved that you now know what
you are truly spending?
Write down what your goals and fears are. Come up with a positive statement about how you will reach your goals, thus crushing
your fears. Although much has been said about the power of positive
thinking, the effects cannot be denied. The more positive your outlook, the more good will come your way. Think about it. The last time
you were in a bad mood, did you affect those around you so their
moods turned sour, too? Similarly, when you smile at people, the
more likely they are to smile back at you. The more positive your
thoughts are about money, the more good things will happen.
One more thing, it’s important to remember that fears come in
different forms than just self-doubt. Many times family members or
loved ones will instill doubt in us. This may come in the form of,
“Why do you think you can do that?” or other statements along those
lines. Whatever the reason for these statements, don’t let them discourage you. Only you can change the way you think. Keep a smile
on your face and a glint in your eye, because you can become as
wealthy as you want to be. By having a more positive outlook, you
may see a change in them, too.